6d (edited) • The Hearth
Secret Magic Words
Right now, I am thinking of language - how I use it, what I mean, what power words can work when applied in various ways. There are the inward meanings - what I'm feeling or thinking that spurs the invocation, and outward meanings, what I verbalize to others, sincerely or sometimes veiled.
Words came to me early, easily. I was an early reader and speller. Could spell ENCYCLOPEDIA before kindergarten, I was proud of it: I created and performed a dance about that in the living room. there was a lot of jumping on the couch, more of a cheer than a dance. lots of shouting. I got swatted. Adults often told me to cheer, dance, and speak LESS.
One time I was in the car with my parents and I read every street sign aloud to drown out the sound of their arguing. Going down the road, there was NO PARKING ANYTIME, NO PARKING ANYTIME, over and over. It became a kind of rhythmic chant, I couldn't stop, i just kept saying it. I must have been on the 20th noparkinganytime before I got yelled at.
My frequent repetitive verbalizations were a calming mechanism for me. Now I know that is called "stimming." I like to think of it as an incantation, a spell, a way to nullify anxiety, agitation, unsettledness. Words are spells, spells take back control, putting the power in our breath, in our bodies, and in the air around us.
i still cast spells. I will cast spells in traffic, on other drivers, loudly and colorfully. There are also secret words I say sometimes to myself, silently or just under my breath, for calm or strength when I need it. Every now and then one comes out loud. If anyone asks what I said, I say nevermind.
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Secret Magic Words
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