Why the Right Tutor Alone Isn’t Enough. And What You- THE PARENT Bring to the Table.

Parents of Year 3–5 children: if you’re thinking of hiring a tutor, this post is for you.

I recently wrote an article that got me thinking hard. When a parent asked me whether a student tutor or an experienced tutor is better, I realised that my answer should be that neither will truly succeed unless you are deeply involved.

Because what most people don’t realise is this:

Tutoring doesn’t magically fix everything.

Without your engagement, your consistency, your emotional support … even the best tutor can only do so much.

Here are the truths I want to repeat.

WHAT REALLY MATTERS

You + Child + Tutor = the golden triangle. Remove one side, and things wobble.

A tutor should do more than teach. They should empower. Teach thinking, not just answers.

Real support comes from checking in regularly. Ask how the session went. What was hard? What felt good?

Expect guidance, not perfection. It’s okay to feel anxious. It’s normal to have weeks when progress is slow.

WHY SOME TUTORING JUST DOESN’T WORK

The tutor comes, and then the parent goes back to business as usual. No consistency.

Relying completely on someone else to “fix” things. Your child ends up passive, not active.

Expectations that are too high or vague. What are you really aiming for? Confidence? Understanding? Skills?

Here’s what to do instead - action steps you can start now.

Ask your tutor to show you how they plan their sessions. Demand clarity.

Be present. Even if it’s ten minutes - review, encourage, discuss.

Set realistic goals. Not perfect scores, but small wins (reading more, using new words, finishing a test).

Celebrate the effort. Not just the result.

If you want, I have a free resource that helps you build from this — a guide called Home Prep for the 11+ – A Parent’s Blueprint. It’ll show you how to build strong foundations with you as the active partner.

Click here to enter your details and download your free guide.

Let’s stop expecting tutors to do it all. Let’s start expecting ourselves to show up. Because that’s where real change happens.

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