I thought I knew what I was doing. Second baby. Pediatric dietitian. This wasn’t new to me.
And yet… between the untouched meals, the thrown spoons, and the quiet realization that this wasn’t always going as planned, I found myself relearning a lot of what I thought I knew.
This month, as we mark one year since my second daughter started solids, I’ve been reflecting — on the questions, the doubt, the small wins, and the moments that reshaped how I show up at the table.
Because in the end, it wasn’t about what she ate. It was about what she taught me: Feeding isn’t about getting food into your child. It’s about the relationship you build for them around it.
As you navigate your own feeding journey, I invite you below to read the thoughts I had… and what lessons I had to remind myself instead.
- Thought: “She didn’t eat enough…”. Lesson: Curiosity over consumption.
I had to reset my expectations — again.
She doesn’t need to eat the food to be learning about it. The touching, the smearing, the chewing it up and spitting it out — this is how familiarity begins.
Some meals looked like nothing happened. But something always was.
More often than not, the tasting came later — when I stopped watching so closely.
2. Thought: “I’ve offered this so many times… maybe she just doesn’t like it.”
Lesson: Repetition builds comfort.
This one tested my patience. Because as adults, we expect variety. We assume interest needs novelty. But for babies, it’s the opposite. Seeing the same food again and again is what builds trust.
Consistency isn’t boring. It’s reassuring.
3. Thought: “Maybe if I just encourage one more bite.” Lesson: Resist pressure.
Even when it sounds gentle. Even when it comes from a good place. They feel it. I noticed it in the pause. The hesitation. The moment she looked at me instead of the food. The second I leaned back — truly let go — she leaned forward again.
It’s humbling how little it takes to shift the entire dynamic.
4. Thought: “She’s not sitting… she’s distracted… this isn’t working.”
Lesson: The environment shapes the experience.
Connection comes first. This one had very little to do with her — and a lot to do with me. The rushed meals, the standing, the half-present moments… those were always the hardest. When I slowed down — even just enough to sit beside her with a cup of tea — everything softened. Not perfect, just… easier.
Because for her, eating wasn’t just about food. It was about being with me.
5. Thought: “She’s just playing with her food…”.
Lesson: Sensory play is learning.
This required the biggest mindset shift. Because yes — it looks messy. And yes — it often ends up everywhere except the mouth. But this is how she understands food. Through her hands first.
When I stopped interrupting the process and started joining it — touching, showing, modeling — it became less of a battle and more of a shared experience.
6. Thought: “Maybe she just doesn’t like this…”.
Lesson: Flavor opens the door.
Sometimes it wasn’t rejection — it just needed an invitation. A little olive oil. A familiar spice or dip. A flavor from our table. We often underestimate how much babies notice — but they do.
And when food feels like our food, not “baby food,” something shifts.
7. Thought: “She barely ate anything today…”.
Lesson: Intake will ebb and flow.
This one still tests me. Because it’s so easy to zoom in on one meal, one day, one moment and think — this isn’t enough. But when I zoomed out, I saw the rhythm. Some days lighter. Some days fuller.
All of it balancing out in ways I didn’t need to control.
8. Thought: “Should I be worried she’s still relying on milk?”.
Lesson: Milk (from nursing or formula) still nourishes.
This isn’t a step backward. Milk is still doing important work — filling in the gaps, supporting growth, offering comfort. There’s so much pressure to “move on” from it.
But feeding doesn’t need to be rushed to be successful.
9. Thought: “It would just be easier if I fed her…”.
Lesson: Independence builds confidence.
And it would be easier. Faster. Cleaner. But every time I paused and let her try — even when it was slow, even when it was messy — she figured something out. A grip. A movement. A bite.
Confidence doesn’t come from doing it perfectly. It comes from being allowed to try.
10. Thought: “Am I doing this right?”
Lesson: Safety at the table is the goal.
This is the one everything comes back to. Not perfect meals. Not perfect intake. But a child who feels safe — not pressured, not rushed, not judged.
Because when the table feels safe, they come back to it. And that’s where everything else grows.
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These weren’t things I didn’t know.
They were things I needed to remember — in the middle of the mess, the doubt, and the very real moments of wondering if I was getting it wrong.
Which of these thoughts have you had recently?
“She didn’t eat enough…”
“Maybe she just doesn’t like it…”
“Am I doing this right?”
Please share it below — I’d love to meet you in that moment 🤍