He was a year and 6 months older than me. I was my brother’s keeper. He was the golden child. He explained to me about algorithms when internet was dial up. Although he was a jock and handed the keys to the world he committed suicide. He struggled with drugs and alcohol. The pedestal we put him on was too much for him to hold onto. Today is his birthday. With the help of this community and modules I have been able to break out of this layer of the matrix I have created for myself. The Survivors Guilt of not being able to save him. For being mad at him. This day I used to panic and spiral into a deep depression Today I celebrate his life. The one we shared. Today I thank God for memories we shared together. The places we went together and the love we had for one another.