15d • General discussion
How it all began
Good morning and happy Sunday! I am sitting here thinking about what I want to write in this space. I have so much I would like to say and communicate with others in the world, but settling my mind and writing something of substance seems to be a challenge for me sometimes. Is it my heart bursting with desire to gather like-minded women together so we can heal from our past trauma and substance misuse - yes for sure! Is it because I feel I have a lot to offer the world by way of my experiences and want to bring women into circle so we can share common experiences and stories around our humanness - absolutely! I have been in recovery most of my life, but I can think of one date in 2012 when I made the decision to stop using alcohol as a painkiller, a substance to alter my pain inside my head and heart, a way of coping and trying to forget the frequency of the ache in my heart and soul. When I put the wine glass down and looked around for help, there wasn't much available to me in terms of what I was seeking. I didn't identify with what was in existent in my community so I started looking deeper into what I needed. I was a 42 year old woman, married with two boys and heart broken with past trauma, regret, discontent with the life path I was on at that time and I deep desire to stop hurting myself and my family. My partner was telling me that he felt I had a problem with alcohol and my children, 13 and 17 at the time were pleading for me to not drink anymore because they didn't like the mom I became when I consumed wine. I knew I had a problem. Here's the thing. I was struggling to accept the problem because I was the child of an alcoholic. I grew up in a home where alcohol changed everything and raised me in an unpredictable environment. As I developed in that home and grew into an adult I promised myself that I would NEVER cause pain to the my family with drinking. In fact, I didn't really drink at all...until the trauma and the stress hit me in my late thirties. I had my babies in the my late twenties and married when I was twenty-five. I didn't drink. It's not something I reached for. Around the time I was struggling, wine culture had arrived on the scene. Social media had been going strong and growing since I turned thirty-seven and people were glamorizing alcohol and how much fun it made life. I got sucked in. One glass of wine led to two glasses of wine, to a whole bottle and then two bottles. Progression. Overconsumption. Loss of control. A buzz and temporary relief from the stabbing ache in my soul. Happy. Free. Fun-Misty. Until it wasn't fun anymore. I had a problem with alcohol and I had to make a change...
I will continue to post more about my story, my progression with alcohol, my eventual diagnosis with PTSD and then Complex PTSD and how this space came to be as time goes on.
For now - I facilitate an amazing, evidence-based program that I offer for free, in this space, weekly on Sundays. I would love for you to join myself and other women in a caring, non-judgemental space where we can learn new coping strategies and a new way of life, together. I am just a woman, on the internet, calling in like-minded women who want to heal together. I am a Certified Holistic Life and Recovery Coach and have been trained to facilitate Seeking Safety - a program written by a Psychologist, Dr. Lisa M Najavits. Further information about the program can be found at this link - https://www.treatment-innovations.org/seeking-safety.html.
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How it all began
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Safe space for women to heal from PTSD & Substance Use Disorder. FREE online weekly program - Seeking Safety - and Holistic Life & Recovery Coaching.
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