Aug 19 • 📝 Journal
Itchy scalp - balding observation
I notice today my scalp is extra itchy. Especially in the front and I produce a lot of dandruff.
Here's what's causing it:
-I feel constant worry and tension, because I fear upsetting my girlfriend over text
-In my mind, I already imagine how she gets angry with me over a comment she misinterprets
-(Even when she actually hasn't said anything - it's literally my mind fearing the worst outcome, and fear coming up at the first thought)
-This causes a huge stress and fear loop, that's been going on for hours
-Frontal area of my scalp is 5/5 itchy, red and scratching elsewhere on scalp makes dandruff fall
If I try to understand what the fear is, it's:
"If I upset her, she might expose me and accuse me of being controlling (even when I'm trying to be suggestive)" -> I feel I am bad -> I fear abandonment
These are some of my deepest issues regarding authority, attachment wounds, and fear of abandonment. While these are things that are causing me emotional suffering, the silver lining is I'm also noticing I'm having these physical symptoms. They play part to my hairline receding.
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Itchy scalp - balding observation
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