The Difference Between Using Your Gift to Empower or to Disempower

Last night’s Q&A training WAS AMAZING! And I learned something that feels fundamental to leadership, coaching, and sales.

When I was younger, my dad had an employee who had been with the company for years. He worked as a courier or mail runner. He was not a bad person, but he was clumsy, inefficient, and easily overwhelmed by simple tasks. Almost every week, there was at least one significant mistake.

One day, after another error, my dad looked at me and said, with a sarcastic smile,

“Look. He was the winning spermatozoid. Could you imagine the rest?”

Same words. Same analogy. Completely different impact.

Last night, Kisha used a very similar analogy, but from an entirely different mental state. She used it to uplift. To remind someone of their inherent capacity. To point them back to the leader and winner already within them. The effect was expansion, not collapse.

That contrast stayed with me.

What fascinates me is that this is not about intelligence, wit, or cleverness. It is about state. The same tool, the same words, the same analogy can either shrink a person or activate them, depending on the consciousness from which it is delivered.

This is the real mastery.

Not knowing what to say, but knowing from where you are saying it.

Last night was a masterclass in using power responsibly. In using clarity to create courage, not shame. In reminding people of who they can be, instead of reinforcing who they fear they are.

Thank you, Kisha, for modeling what it looks like to use your gift in service of elevation. This kind of leadership does not just teach skills. It shapes states. And states change lives.

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