Closing a 3-Year Collaboration: what I learned about knowing when to leave

Reading time: 2/3 min.

Today I closed a long-standing collaboration — my first ever social client (spoiler: It was not easy at all).

We started at ~6,000 followers; today the ecosystem we built reaches a pool of 425k+ with millions of accounts touched every month. I’m proud of that arc.

This isn’t a rant. It’s a field note for anyone (including me) navigating a relationship — client or personal — that might have run its course.

3 lessons I wish I’d learned sooner:

1) Clear communication isn’t optional — it’s a duty (to yourself).Not saying what doesn’t work doesn’t make you “easy” to work with; it just makes you quietly resentful. People carry different experiences and beliefs. Expecting them to intuit our boundaries is wishful thinking. Say the thing — early, specifically, and kindly.

2) Choosing change means wrestling with your own biology.Our brains love the familiar because it feels safe. That’s great for stability — and terrible for growth. We’ll tolerate low-grade toxicity because it’s less scary than the unknown. If you’ve been “coping” more than “creating,” that’s a signal.

3) Don’t minimize your feelings or normalize disrespect.Over time, I excused a few offhand comments and public remarks that didn’t position me well — partly because there was a near-friendship with the owner. Drip by drip, that eroded my energy. I was giving 101%, yet feeling diminished. That mismatch matters. Boundaries aren’t pettiness; they’re professional hygiene.

How I decided it was time

I ran a quick check I use with myself: