Day 1 · AI For R*tards

Kaymon Noble

5d • ✍️ Homework

Day 1

Day 1 — Struggles & Wins (get real)

5 Struggles

Due to my severe depression, it is hard for me to see much of any joy in anything. Even as a Christian, husband, father, and pastor, I struggle to find joy in those things. It’s not their fault by any means. It’s just the way my brain is wired. Everything takes more work to continue on.
I was finally diagnosed as autistic in January ‘24. I have spent all my life pretending to be someone I am not. You’d think with finally getting the diagnosis that I would be more myself, but that’s not the case. I still walk around with a mask most of the time. I know I’m weird and the judgement has shown that. So, it’s easier to be someone I’m not.
I’ve always had a smaller frame–even as someone who goes to the gym. I was made fun of in grade school for being able to see my collarbones. My metabolism and growing up poor made gaining weight a struggle.
I’ve struggled with suicidal ideology since I was a teenager. I’ve attempted once–after coming to know Christ as Lord and Savior. A multitude of things have lead to the ideation–seeing physical/verbal abuse, moving constantly, no friends, no girlfriend, being bullied, and believing everyone would be better without me.
I’m a confusingly emotional person. Many people will say I do not cry, get happy, or get angry over the right things and I do at the wrong things. I have been told I’m not empathetic by my mom. I’ve been told I don’t care by those closest to me.

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5 Contrasting Wins:

Depression: I grew up in a depressed household thus leading to my diagnosis. Yet, I do not have to lead my children in this same direction. I have learned to give myself time and space when needed. When we go out as a family or they want to do something, then I do that. Perhaps the beginning is pretending, but I get pure enjoyment out of it in the end. Patience and learning this life is not for me, but them is how I have to live.
Autism: While it still takes forever for me to “come out of my shell”. I have learned to be more open about it. This has allowed me to give voice especially to men about their diagnosis. It pushes me to speak more as a Christian, father, husband, and pastor. The last three are rather difficult as an autist at times.
Collarbones: Being small sucks. Now I’m on TRT 😎 While that is true—it isn’t the point. Being small has taught me a great deal of patience and intentionality. If I want something I have to work hard for it and often times harder than the average. This covers the entirety of my life, but it started with the gym. It’s helped me to write some decent poetry too.
Suicide: I’m in a unique position. I’ve got suicidal ideation. I’m open about that as a Christian where “everything is supposed to be okay.” My wife new somewhat of the difficulties before getting married, but she’s learning which means she’s growing. My children are too young to know, but they give me a reason to fight. As a pastor, I talk freely as a sinful man whose thorn in his side is depression. All of this to say, the Lord has opened a door for me to help others who are on the edge, who are thinking about irreversible damage. I don’t have all the answers, but I know the One who does. I don’t have all the answers, but I know how to listen.
Emotions: Obviously, I’m not all put together, but I am genuine. I don’t shy away from crying. Very very rarely will I ever burst out in anger. Often, I will cry. I cry over a lot of things whether it’s anger, joy, happiness, sadness, and other emotions. Because they’re not controlled I call it a struggle, but because I’m open with my emotions I call it a win. I’m tired of seeing men thinking men don’t share emotions. All throughout Scripture men showed their emotions. Some not so great. Some great. We’ll create stronger men when they learn they can cry. ______________________________________

Circled Contrasting Win (to use this week): Suicide

Hook Activity: Write 3 Curiosity Loop Hooks:

As a pastor, you’d think I’d have it all figured out…
Christians are the happiest people in the world, right?
Every week I stand behind the pulpit proclaiming the greatest joy ever known…

Stories today: 3–5 frames about writing this list; utilize the poll function for something

Community post: “Day 1”

Format appropriately and then copy and paste your 5 Struggles, your 5 Contrasting Wins and your 3 best Hooks in a Skool Post with the title:

Day 1

Then explain in at least 3 lines of text your visual concept for this reel and the emotion you want to evoke.

EXAMPLE:

Emotion Attempting to Evoke: Relief

(Hook)

“As a pastor, you’d think I’d have it all figured out…”

(Visual Concept)

Sitting in my spinny chair at the office and spinning around with my Bible in hand.

(Voiceover)

“But I don’t. Far from it actually…

I’ve dealt with suicidal ideation for over half my life…

This is what I’ve learned from it…”

(Visual Concept)

Pictures of the last 14+ years as severely depressed yet thuggin’ through the rainy days.

(Voiceover)

“Don’t be afraid to talk. Don’t put on a facade. Even some of the greatest men in Scripture thought life wasn’t worth it and they were used mightily. It’s okay to not be okay. The question is what’re you going to do with it?”

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